Wednesday, May 31, 2006
phew! just finished d interview for d election of d exco com. it was im-not-sure-how-i-do. i just blabber what comes to mind. haha. anw, i wont forget this particular question. people wat comewat event la. haiz. jage kau. mepek jer. but i dun remember wat i reply. just shoot d fire wif wateva capacity of water i have. haha. anw, move on. i got my pay netty-naffiah today. hurray2. haha.
n tomoro im going to meet d dvl boi again. do u noe? he spat on me yesterday and throw his crayon at my face. arrrgh! watch out, u boi. haha. anw, he's cute after some consoling moments. i tot of giving him up, but just dono lah...
i miss him. now n then.
but i love him. now n insya'allah, forever. if onli god noes how long is forever.
hope we can face upcoming challenges together. we need ALLAH's blessing and cahaya to help us see the path to d right route in life.
noted@
8:24 PM
free me to fly on my own
Monday, May 29, 2006
im feelin' helpless...
just told him tat i singgah balcony for a while last friday, d nite-out wif rab.
he's bingit wif me. n im d idiotic one. who doesnt know where to put her brains...
anw, my nite wif rab was gr8! we watched midnight movie da vinci code. it was rather draggy and long but it was a gd run-up. then, we walked from lido to where we met her clicks for a while. i didnt wana go up but she pestered me. n i was scared sey. haiz. anw, fast forward. unimportant facts. we then walked till esplanade. i tink it's about 100km of walk. haha. super tired. we did some stuff along d way. ya. d shoot-tak-jadi-sebab-tak-tahan stunt. we sat along d esplanade, by d river. i slept halfway. couldnt stand it. my contacts were dried up. anw, we woke up and went down to little india, serangoon to eat THOSAI. my fav. yippee. we went hm after tat.
she is still d fren i knew 10 years ago...and she will be a fren for a lifetime. insya'allah.
back to myself, ive been feeling weird and strange within me. wats wrong wif me? wat have i done to myself? dont i love myself animore?
noted@
9:46 PM
free me to fly on my own
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Ever heard of this quote?
LOVE- one word that frees us from all the weight and pain in life…
It’s not all tat true. In d facts of life, love sometimes is d biggest burden compared to all other things.
He’s wants to go to rouge tomoro. W/o me. Haha. U noe how it feels like? Fucking shit!!
Miss fan so much. Much more than I miss d animals at d zoo on 7march2004.
Wat am I getting myself into?
I wished I were single, get to try all d stuff people my age are experiencing. Clubbing, flirting, dating…sometimes I wish, I didn’t really noe much about love. Tat way, I get to experience n enjoy.
To me, it’s really annoying and fucking irritating when I noe tat something and someone is doing something for d sake of something else besides feeling it.
Sarcasm? Sometimes, I wish I could live w/o it. But I can’t. It’s just d way I live and survive. I don’t have much money to spend. I don’t really have strong social peers to depend on. True friendships? I guess I have tat, but sometimes u just think of doing tings by urself, rather than being dependent on external factors. Love, I have them, more than one. I believe so. But love will go away, if u request them to do so. Or they might just disappear.
So, I have nothing much in life, than myself to depend on.
i love him so much. i badly want him, now! and i want him to represent my future....
noted@
2:26 AM
free me to fly on my own
Sunday, May 21, 2006
mia...ya i noe...missing in action for a long time.
anw, started off this morning wif tutoring at bb. gotta noe atiqah much better. nice. im loving it. d first for d day. then went to town wif mentee, zaima and sisters, brother. orite. d jalan2 was penat. but d time spent together was gr8. get to noe them better. im loving it. 2nd for d day. walking and walking and walking, guess who i saw?
li kai lun...
haha. just gave him a testi a few days back. anw, he looked cute and sachok. haha. siap bawak helmet lagi. haha. gr8 day. im loving it. 3rd for d day. then, mas ayam called me up and we met up. bual2....best sey! i love catching up good old times. n guess what we did? while crossing d road, there's a quarrel btwn a pedestrian and a driver. so both makcik kepo went one corner to look2 la. and one of d gal went to give d police a kol. haha. definately not me ryte. yup. mas. k then, we went to buy maggi and chilled at her house. lala. im loving it. 4th for d day.
and d fifth one is......getting free wireless connection to type today's entry....
wahahahaha...im loving it!
noted@
11:29 PM
free me to fly on my own
today's sunday. 21 May 2006. n tonite's almost tomoro. these are a year's old.
can i just do this? i simply love doing it. i hated how things had happened. it did, somehow. but it
just made me feel strong thinking of them. memories.
y r u so nice to me awk? awk, u helped me across some of d darkest points of my lyf. i lacked the capacity to repay u but i'll do d best i can.
awk, i need to tell u this. im scared awk. scared bcoz u r suppressing ur feelings about me. scared tat it might just shrink away. scared tat u wont love me anymore.
just ignore my feelings awk. i dun wanna lose d friendship coz i treasure it. u told me to stop but i chose not to. im a guy awk, and naturally i want d best. sori awk.
there was a time my heart died. it was cold and hard. i strayed. i enjoyed being it, but it wasnt until one day i looked into the mirror and hated wat i saw. i dun wanna be tat no more.
do u hate me? if u want me to, u haf gotta try harder. much2 and way2 harder. after all tat u haf taught me, tyms u haf spent wif me and wat u haf given me, how can i hate u? i couldnt possibly do tat. i cant and i wont.
u wanna noe y i lyk being ard u? we understand each other and im not afraid to be myself bcoz u gave me ample space for me to put aside my facade n let out d real me. thx.
thx awk. in d past, i once owned ur heart. n it was d best tym of my lyf. i noe u understand y. y didnt i meet u earlier? y??? i got something gd n i lost it.
noted@
11:03 PM
free me to fly on my own
